This evening, while watching the news with my family, I saw a brief report of a solider from Indiana who was killed a few days ago in Afghanistan. Despite the fact that Jeremy is home now, and will most likely not be deployed again, hearing of the death of a soldier still makes me sick. I spent way too much time during Jeremy's deployment imagining what it would be life if something happened to him. And I can still very clearly remember the anxiety from days of hearing nothing from him, and far too much on the news of escalating violence.
I wish that I could say that after the separation, the anxiety, and the longing for Jeremy and his safety, that I will never take for granted my time with him, and savor the moments we have together, but unfortunately I am human, and I am selfish, and someday I will probably become accustomed to being around him, the moments will lose their novelty. But for now, after being reminded of what he made it home from, I want to hold him and just allow myself to be relieved and grateful that he is alive and well. I want to savor the short periods of time we have together, and enjoy the anticipation that comes with waiting to see him again.
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